D’var Torah – December 26

A second story: a young man who is always glued to his phone is on a cross-country business trip when he gets a flat tire. There’s no cell service, no WiFi…nothing. He’s never done anything remotely mechanical in his life, but without any other option, he opens the car manual and proceeds to put on a spare.

A final story: a young woman is also on a cross-country business trip when her cars break down similarly in the middle of nowhere with a blizzard on the way. With no cell service, she walks to the closest farmhouse. She is hesitant to knock on the door given the fact that there are crosses on the front lawn, as well as political flags on the porch and religious iconography in the windows with which she vehemently disagrees, but with the snow and howling winds closing in and no other viable alternatives, she knocks on the door. The elderly husband and wife that open their home to her treat her like one of the family, so much so in fact, that she is reluctant to leave when the storm passes.

Months later, at a young professionals gathering at their shul, the four tell the Rabbi of their adventures…except, well… they kvetch (complain). “Oy, that fakata pipe”; “Can you believe I had to change a tire in the middle of nowhere”; and “that blizzard was horrific, it could have killed me.” The Rabbi counsels them: “Because of that burst pipe, you two put aside your differences and are now closer as a couple; because of that flat tire, you put down your phone and discovered the value of working with your hands; and because you were stranded in the middle of nowhere, you saw the graciousness and humanity of those with whom you disagree.”

Too often, when confronted with a challenge, a disappointment or setback, or an obstacle, we see it for that and that alone. In this week’s parsha of Vayigash (Genesis 44:18-47:27), however, we are taught that crucibles can in fact bring about brachot (blessings) or be brachas in and of themselves.

When Joseph reveals himself to siblings, they are in fear, believing that after 22 years [1] since they sold him into slavery, he is going to exact a merciless revenge on them for their treachery. Instead he comforts them:

“…do not be distressed or reproach yourselves because you sold me hither; it was to save life that God sent me ahead of you. It is now two years that there has been famine in the land, and there are still five years to come in which there shall be no yield from tilling. God has sent me ahead of you to ensure your survival on earth, and to save your lives in an extraordinary deliverance…” [*Genesis 45:5-7]

In other words, if they not had not acted duplicitously and malevolently, Joseph would never have ended up in a position of power where he could aid his family.

Many years ago, while I was in rabbinical school, I completed a summer unit of Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE) at the Louisville VA. At the door of the VA’s chapel, there was a poem by an unknown soldier from the Civil War. The short poem read as follows:

I asked God for strength, that I might achieve . . .
I was made weak, that I might learn humbly to obey.
I asked for health, that I might do greater things . . .
I was given infirmity, that I might do better things.
I asked for riches, that I might be happy . . .
I was given poverty, that I might be wise.
I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men . . .
I was given weakness, that I might feel the need of God.
I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life . . .
I was given life, that I might enjoy all things.
I got nothing that I asked for—but everything I had hoped for.
Almost despite myself, my unspoken prayers were answered.
I am among all men, most richly blessed![2]

This poem has stayed with me since I first read it, serving as a reminder to always look for a silver lining and grow from all moments in life.

Perhaps, Rebbetzin Dena Weinberg (z”l) of Aish HaTorah put it most succinctly: “There are no problems, only opportunities for growth.”

In a few days it will be 2026. In this new year, Bizrat HaShem, with God’s help, may we resolve and challenge ourselves to look at situations, and indeed life itself, more positively, to find silver linings no matter how dark the storm clouds, and to seek out opportunities for growth.