Weekly D’var Torah

Shabbat Shalom!

I pray this finds you all well.

As a liberal arts guy, I’ve always held medical professionals (doctors, PA’s, dentists, pharmacists, psychologists, APRN’s, medics, corpsmen, EMT’s, etc.) in the highest regard. Obviously, first and foremost, their job…their calling, their passion is to save lives and provide their charges with a better quality of life. But it’s also about the vast amount of knowledge – anatomy, biochemistry, toxicology, hematology, virology, radiology, oncology, psychology, pharmacology – that they possess and their ability to fuse these complex disciplines into diagnoses and treatments.

One day, I’m having lunch with a friend of mine who’s a doctor. He tells me how wonderful, how noble it is that I’m a Rabbi. I tell him, “Look, thanks, I appreciate it, but I can’t even hold a candle to what you do, to what you provide for folks.” He replies, “You want to know a secret? 80% of all health is in the hands of an individual. Think about it – exercising regularly, drinking plenty of water, brushing your teeth, avoiding fast food, getting your daily steps in, putting on sunscreen and wearing a hat and sunglasses, taking vitamins and minerals, not smoking or using tobacco products, drinking alcohol sparingly, getting enough sleep, reading, doing mental stimulation games, stretching, eating a healthy diet, not doing any illegal drugs, washing your hands, bathing, avoiding dangerous habits like driving drunk, high, or distracted, oh…and not holding lit fireworks in your hand on July 4th weekend; you do all those things, that’s a huge chunk of preventive health right there. If folks followed these simple things, you can bet I’d have a lot less patients coming to see me. And here’s the thing, these are easy fixes that don’t require any pre-med, med school, or a residency.”

Holy cow! He had a point. I had always thought about each of these simple practices individually, but put them together, and collectively they go a long way towards giving us good health and a great quality of life.

There’s an old saying: “cleanliness is next to godliness.”

But what if we were to say that to be healthy and clean is to be holy, and equally so, to be holy is to be healthy and clean? In other words, the two go seamlessly hand-in-hand. What if we were to say that our bodies were klei kadosh – vessels of holiness and treat them as such?

In this week’s combined parsha of Tazria-Metzorah (Leviticus 12:1-15:33) we see the confluence of health, cleanliness, and holiness. We receive multiple mitzvot (commandments) such as destroying one’s clothing if they become afflicted with a skin disease (Leviticus 13:45), not shaving a scall (Leviticus 13:33), and immersing oneself in a mikveh in order to cleanse and purify oneself after episodes of impurity (Leviticus 12:6; 14:10; 15:13-14, 28-29).

It’s remarkable – these mitzvot were not only meant to achieve a state of ritual and spiritual purity, but also had the effect of maintaining a degree of hygiene and wellness. In other words, physical, biological health comes from the Torah, the realm of the spiritual, thus placing it in a state of holiness. Tazria-Metzorah is far from the only example of this. For instance, in Deuteronomy 23:13, the Israelites are commanded to dig and utilize latrines outside of camp.

Another important point worthy of mention is that while many of the acts of purification and cleanliness require the presence, assistance, or declaration of a kohen, there are others that do not and can be done individually. The same can be said of our everyday holiness. There are many things that we can do each and every day- donning tefillin, reciting the Shema, saying the morning, afternoon, and evening prayers, reading the great Rabbis, contributing to tzedakah, performing gimilut chasadim and ma’asim tovim, and studying Daf Yomi – all of which we can do without the need for a Rabbi or a Shul, and of all of which allow us to access the holy and the sacred.

Two of our great sages echoed these sentiments. The Rambam taught, “The properties of the soul depend on the condition of the body,” and the Jewish philosopher Martin Buber wrote, “The soul must not boast that is more holy than the body, for only in that it has climbed down into the body and works through its limbs can the soul attain to its perfection. The body on the other hand, may not brag of supporting the soul, for even when the soul leaves, the flesh falls into decay.”[1]

Perhaps the lesson from Tazria-Metzorah is two-fold: first, health and holiness are deeply and purposely linked, and second, so much of our health and holiness is in our own hands.

Bizrat HaShem, with God’s help, may we all pursue intertwined health and holiness.

Wishing you a Good Shabbos and a great weekend.

Bivrakha,

Rabbi Aaron Stucker-Rozovsky

Beth El Congregation | 520 Fairmont Ave, Winchester, VA 22601

(540) 667-1889 (office)

Why Construction Crews Wear Neon

Shabbat Shalom!

I pray this finds you all well.

As true as it is, the expression “Experience is the best teacher,” is a pretty harsh and cold concept. In other words, it means that painful mistakes, embarrassing errors, unfortunate accidents, and regrettable actions are going to give us tangible and palpable lessons that we’ll never be able to forget. It’s sad, it’s frightening, and it’s incredibly heartbreaking, but there is a great deal of pragmatism, truth, and honesty to it.

In this week’s parsha of Shemini (Leviticus 9:1-11:47), we see such a painful and tragic error play out.

We read: “Aaron’s sons Nadab and Abihu each took his fire pan, put fire in it, and laid incense on it; and they offered before God alien fire, which had not been enjoined upon them. And fire came forth from God and consumed them; thus they died at the instance of God.” (Leviticus 10:1-2*)

It’s a mistake, and a very, very costly one at that, for the two novice priests who are brand-new to the job. More than a mistake and an accident, it’s a senseless tragedy and it should never have happened.

Sadly, we see the human toll that accidents, mistakes, and errors have on those around us. Go down the highway and you’ll see crosses marking where drivers sadly met their end, go past a construction crew and you’ll realize why they wear brightly colored, reflective, neon clothing and hard hats, put out orange safety cones and road flares, and have their own signage, drive past a high school right before prom and graduation season and you’ll get why they park a car wreck from a fatal DUI or distracted driving fatality right out front, or go to any building and you’ll understand why there are signs clearly displaying how to get to an emergency exit. In most of these cases, I posit that some terrible series of events had to have taken place at some point in the past that influenced how and why we do the things that we do in the present day.

The question begs: how do we make sure that we and those whom we love and care about never become a case study, statistic, news story, or tragic example?

To this end, the Talmud tells us a few things. For instance, Rav Dimi of Nehardea declares, “once an error is taught, it is taught, and cannot be easily corrected.” (Bava Batra 21a). In other words, if you see something wrong, unethical, immoral, dangerous, or unsafe, call it out immediately! If unsafe habits and practices fester, they can quickly become ingrained and institutionalized. Rabbi Judah teaches, “be careful in study, for an error in study counts as a deliberate sin.” (Pirkei Avot 4:13). I would take this to mean check, double check, and even triple check your work. Heck, have the humility to have someone go over your work as well. And if in doubt, check yourself a fourth time! Finally, there is a beautiful lesson from Derekh Eretz Zuta: “If you desire to study, do not say regarding what you do not understand, ‘I understand’. If you are questioned on [even] a trivial matter and you are not acquainted with it, be not ashamed to say, ‘I do not know’. If you were taught something which you did not grasp, be not ashamed to say [to the teacher], ‘Repeat it to me’ and do not pretend to yourself ‘I understood it’.” (Derekh Eretz Zuta 2:3).

We are bound to make errors and mistakes and have accidents happen to us because, after all, we are human. However, that does not mean these calamities aren’t preventable. If we get into a proactive and thoughtful mindset there is a lot of sadness and pain that we can get ahead of and even prevent. There are best practices and habits that are within our grasp that can mitigate and even eliminate such risks.

Bizrat HaShem, with God’s help, may we take full advantage of the wisdom, patience, insight, awareness, understanding, thoughtfulness, humility, and common sense that we have in our minds, hearts, and souls to act safely both for our sakes and for the sake of others.

Wishing you a Good Shabbos and a great weekend.

Bivrakha,

Rabbi Aaron Stucker-Rozovsky

Beth El Congregation | 520 Fairmont Ave, Winchester, VA 22601

(540) 667-1889 (office)

Quick Rabbi’s note:

Hi, Everyone – Shabbat Shalom Moadim L’simcha!

   A quick apology!  Next week is actually Parsha Shemini…   …  This week is a special reading in honor of Pesach. (Exodus 14:30 – 15:21) (Haftarah II Samuel 22:1 – 51)

My apologies for any confusion, but I do hope you find this D’var Torah meaningful, nonetheless!

Wishing you a good Shabbos and a Happy Passover!  – Rabbi Aaron

Sometimes Silence is Best

Shabbat Shalom and Chag Sameach! I hope this finds you all well.

I was very blessed with a phenomenal teacher and mentor during my time in Rabbinical school. I am forever grateful to him for his tutelage and friendship. Of all the nuggets of wisdom he shared with me, I’ll always remember a story he told me: there was a woman who had just lost her husband. They had been married for years and years and years. Their love for one another had neither ceased nor diminished; if anything, in fact, it had only grown with time. As one can easily understand, the widow was devastated. After the funeral, shiva was held at the widow’s house. Friends and family chatted and talked. The widow sat there on her living room couch, crying softly. My mentor went over to her. He offered no words, not a single syllable or utterance. He simply sat down next to her and held her hand. He held her hand and she held his for hours. No words – no mitzvot from Torah, no poetry from psalms or proverbs, no commentary from Rashi or Rambam… just his silent, reassuring, comforting presence. I’ll remember that story as long as I live.

I’ve loved our prophet Moses, Moshe Rabbeinu, since I was first taught about him at three years old. I’ve been in awe of his holiness, leadership, bravery, tenacity, humility, resiliency, and perseverance. He truly is the greatest of all our prophets.  But Moses was human, and because of that, sometimes he got it wrong, and that’s ok; in fact, there’s probably something humanizing and reassuring about that that makes him far more real, human, relatable, and accessible to us. I posit that in this week’s parsha of Shemini (Leviticus 9:1-11:47), we see one of these instances.

In Leviticus 10:1-2, after offering “alien fire” on the altar, Aaron’s two eldest sons, the newly appointed priests Nadab and Abihu, are killed.  In the next line, literally the next line, Moses turns to Aaron and says: “This is what God meant by saying: ‘Through those near to Me I show Myself holy, And gain glory before all the people.*’” (Leviticus 10:3).

When I hear Moses’ words I am reminded of other unhelpful, and quite frankly counterproductive words of “comfort and consolation”:

It is the adult who tells a child who has lost their first dog or cat, “oh don’t worry, you can get another one.”

It is the person who tells their friend going through a painful break-up or divorce after a multi-year relationship that no one saw coming, “it’s all good, there are plenty of fish in the sea.”

And it is the person who tells a woman who has suffered a traumatic miscarriage or still-born, “it’s ok, you can try again.”

When Moses says these words to Aaron, the text tells us the following: “And Aaron was silent.” (Leviticus 10:3).

For many, silence is awkward and uncomfortable. In moments of deep sadness and pain, we try to break the silence of pain and fill the pain of silence with words, any words really. We need words to make ourselves feel less awkward and we assume that those in pain need it as well. However, our forefathers saw past this and taught that sometimes less is more and that silence can truly be golden.

Rabbi Yehuda of the Talmud taught “The best remedy of all is silence;” (Megillah 18.a.11). In Proverbs we read “A knowledgeable man is sparing with his words; A man of understanding is reticent. Even a fool, if he keeps silent, is deemed wise; Intelligent, if he seals his lips; (Proverbs 17:27-28) Rabbi Shimon ben Elazar teaches “Do not assuage the anger of your friend at the time of his anger; do not console him at the time when his deceased lies before him…” (Pirkei Avot 4:9); and finally, Rabbi Shlomo ibn Gabirol declares “In seeking wisdom, the first step is silence, the second listening, the third remembering, the fourth practicing, the fifth teaching others.”[1]

Bizrat HaShem, with God’s help and guidance, may we know when to offer words of hope, consolation, and reassurance to our neighbors, friends and family, and may we know when to simply be there with them in the pain of silence and silence of pain.

Wishing you a Good Shabbos, a Happy Passover, and a great weekend.

Bivrakha,

Rabbi Aaron Stucker-Rozovsky

Beth El Congregation | 520 Fairmont Ave, Winchester, VA 22601

(540) 667-1889 (office)

Shabbat Shalom and Chag Paseach Kasher v’Sameach!

I hope this finds you all well.

There is probably no worse statement or refrain in the entire history of mankind’s presence in the workplace than, “don’t worry about it, you’ll figure it out.”

Seriously, if you’re in the hospital, would you want a couple of brand-new residents to stick you with some unknown quantity of only God-knows-what because this is what the attending said to them when they asked for help and guidance?    Would you want to be anywhere near a building site after a foreman tells a construction worker who’s on his first day on the job to go into the cab of a wrecking ball crane and get started with this mantra?

Or, would you want to get back into your car after a junior mechanic was feeling overwhelmed, and when he asked his supervisor for advice, that was their boss’s answer?

No, of course not!

It’s fair to say that things like college, law, medical, and trade school, basic training, and other professional programs are only going to teach us so much. We’re going to learn a lot of the practical elements and best practices while on the job out in the field. And why?

I think there are three reasons for this:

1. Our fields, no matter what they are, are constantly evolving and quickly changing. This is due to everything from laws and regulations to keeping pace with technology.

2. There is always going to be a lag, a gap between the institutional “school house” and the “real world.” It’s no one’s fault, but it’s hard to get what’s happening out in the field sent back to the school houses where it has to be reviewed, codified, formalized, agreed upon, and then translated into lesson plans with its associated material.

3. Finally, there is simply not enough time to teach us every aspect of our jobs, occupations, and skills. If schools did this, we’d probably stay there until we’re 50!

But this does not excuse a lack of knowledge or competency on anyone’s end. This is where on-the-job training (OJT) comes in. On-the-job training goes by many different names: “OJT”, “left-seat, right-seat”, “staff orientation”, “traineeship”, “apprenticeship”, etc. The point of OJT is to close the gap between what someone learned in the school house and what they’ll be doing in the field. It connects theory with hands-on application. If conducted properly, there shouldn’t be a lot of “don’t worry, you’ll figure it out’s” being flung around.

In this week’s parsha of Tzav (Leviticus 6:1-8:36), we perhaps see, I posit, OJT in action.

From the first lines: “God spoke to Moses, saying: ‘Command Aaron and his sons thus: This is the ritual of the burnt offering: The burnt offering itself shall remain where it is burned upon the altar all night until morning, while the fire on the altar is kept going on it. The priest shall dress in linen raiment, with linen breeches next to his body; and he shall take up the ashes to which the fire has reduced the burnt offering on the altar and place them beside the altar,’” (Leviticus 6:1-3) through the last two lines: “Everything done today, God has commanded to be done [seven days], to make expiation for you. You shall remain at the entrance of the Tent of Meeting day and night for seven days, keeping God’s charge—that you may not die—for so I have been commanded.’ And Aaron and his sons did all the things that יהוה had commanded through Moses*,”(Leviticus 8:34-36), we observe God through Moses, giving last minute instructions, tips, procedures, regulations, performance measures, and best practices to Aaron and his sons. In other words, God is giving them the practical elements and fine points of their duties, their jobs.

Rabbeinu Bahya, quoting the Zohar, paints a perfect scene of what took place: “During these seven days Moses performed the High Priest’s duties (dressed only in a white tunic) in order to confer all this sanctity upon Aaron. Rabbi Abba said that seeing that Moses was firmly rooted in the holy place whence all this power stemmed, he was able to transfer this sanctity to Aaron.”[1]

It is the ultimate example of “left seat-right seat.”

To show just how serious this topic of OJT should be taken, we need only look a few chapters prior. In Exodus 30:9 we are told,

“You shall not offer alien incense on it, or a burnt offering or a meal offering; neither shall you pour a libation on it.” Yet next week, in parsha Shemini, we will read how Aaron’s sons Nadab and Abihu both tragically perish after offering aish zarah – strange fire at the altar (Leviticus 10:1-2).

It raises two powerful questions:

1. Did Moses convey this prohibition to Aaron and his sons?

2. Did Nadab and Abihu actively listen to their uncle?

In Judaism, one of our most cherished dictums is lilmod ulelamed- we will learn and we will teach. We see it in every facet of our Jewish lives as we teach our children the Shema, tell them of the stories and mitzvot found in Torah, prepare them for Bar and Bat Mitzvah, and apropos to this season, have them ask the four questions at the Passover Seder.

It is therefore incumbent that each of us, when adding someone new to our team, heading to a new position, or hanging up our spurs, give the most clear, thorough, and comprehensive OJT as possible to those who come after us. This is a sacred duty and responsibility.

Bizrat HaShem, with God’s help, may the words, “don’t worry about it, you’ll figure it out,” never come from our lips or be heard in the ears of those who follow us.

Wishing you a Good Shabbos and a very Happy and Healthy Passover.

Bivrakha,

Rabbi Aaron Stucker-Rozovsky

Beth El Congregation | 520 Fairmont Ave, Winchester, VA 22601

(540) 667-1889 (office)

Shabbat Shalom!

I hope this finds you all well.

Many moons ago, back when I was a gawky teenager in my senior year of high school, I gave a ride home to two fellow seniors. I thought I was so cool, so great driving other folks around. I was so consumed with this sense of adolescent hubris and youthful arrogance that as I turned right at a red stop light, I literally didn’t think to look to my left to see if there was any oncoming traffic. We almost got hit and I had to peel off the road to avoid a collision. I was beyond ashamed and embarrassed, and my classmates were visibly shaken by the experience. Ridden with guilt, I told my dad (of blessed memory) what happened as soon as I got home, handed him the car keys, and declared that I never wanted to drive again. After a couple days, he sat me down and asked me four questions:

“What did you do?”

“What were the implications of what you did?”

“Did you apologize to your classmates and make amends with them?”

“What are you going to do in the future to make sure that never happens again?”

I answered the first three questions to his satisfaction, but my answer to his fourth- “I’m never driving again,” was simply not acceptable to him. He handed me the keys to the car, and said, “you’re going to take me to the supermarket and I’m going to give you the directions.” We took a very long, scenic route getting there, one that involved a lot of four-way intersections, red lights, stop signs, and right turns.

Looking back, I can’t be more grateful to my Dad. It was the ultimate “dust yourself off and get back on the horse” moment.

I’ll be honest – I hadn’t thought about that story from my life for years, and I do mean years, until I came to this week’s parsha of Vayikra (Leviticus 1:1-5:26).

In Vayikra, God tells Moses the following:

“When a person unwittingly incurs guilt in regard to any of God’s commandments about things not to be done, and does one of them —

If it is the anointed priest who has incurred guilt, so that blame falls upon the people, he shall offer for the sin of which he is guilty a bull of the herd without blemish as a sin offering to God.

If it is the community leadership of Israel that has erred and the matter escapes the notice of the congregation, so that they do any of the things which by God’s commandments ought not to be done, and they realize guilt — when the sin through which they incurred guilt becomes known, the congregation shall offer a bull of the herd as a sin offering, and bring it before the Tent of Meeting.

The elders of the community shall lay their hands upon the head of the bull before God, and the bull shall be slaughtered before God.” (Leviticus 4:2-4, 13-15*)

Earlier this week I was listening to retired Navy SEAL and podcaster Jocko Willink as he interviewed fellow retired SEAL Jim Foreman. Specifically, they discussed mistakes and errors they made on the battlefield and how they dusted themselves off and got back on the horse. Willink offered the following nuggets of advice:

“…it’s my fault and sometimes; [and] people, they take that to the point of ’it’s my fault and therefore I need to be punished over and over and over again and never forgiven.’…If you can’t say ‘oh yeah, here’s what I did, this was my intent, I didn’t intend for this bad thing to happen but it is certainly is something I did. I’m going to learn from it and I’m going to forgive myself and move on.’… I think if you can go, ‘okay, here’s where I am culpable, here’s the mistakes that I made, here’s how I’ll prevent them happening again,’ I think that’s the way out of it and the way to move forward in life.” [1]

Interestingly enough, the Jewish Publication Society’s 1985 translation of the Torah alternatively calls the khatat the sin offering, the “offering of purgation.”[2] In other words, it means purging, removing, getting rid of the sin from one’s presence and life.

The beauty of the sin offering/offering of purgation is that it allowed our ancestors to atone for their errors, learn from their mistakes, and get back to work with the full knowledge of what they had gained from their experience.

Bizrat HaShem, with God’s help, may we always atone for and learn from our errors, may others accept our atonement (and we their’s), and may we all come back from our mistakes stronger, wiser, more compassionate, and overall better people.

Wishing you a Good Shabbos and a great weekend.

Bivrakha,

Rabbi Aaron Stucker-Rozovsky

Beth El Congregation | 520 Fairmont Ave, Winchester, VA 22601

(540) 667-1889 (office)

Shabbat Shalom!

I hope this finds you all well.

My wife and I love looking up and trying workouts that are designed and recommended by those in the know – be they fitness gurus, celebrity personal trainers, social media influencers, championship sports teams, and elite military units. Why? Because they’re fun to try, we enjoy the challenge, and they force us to dig deep and push ourselves physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

There’s one workout I’ll never forget seeing (although, sadly, I can’t find it on YouTube anymore). A group of Marine option NROTC midshipmen are about to commence a grueling circuit workout of planks, lunges, curl-ups, push-ups, rope climbs, weight lifting, and, of course, constant running throughout. Their trainer, a seasoned Gunnery Sergeant, calls them together and says, “You’re going to get out of this what you put into it.” Not, “You better ace this thing,” or “I don’t want to see any of you taking it easy on yourselves.” His sublime words are fatherly and parental, and thus I’ve found great inspiration in them.

In this week’s parsha of Vayakhel (35:1-38:20), Moses tells the people to donate their personal items to build and furnish the Mishkan, the Tabernacle – God’s dwelling places among Israel. He says:

“Take from among you gifts to God; everyone whose heart is so moved shall bring them—gifts for God – gold, silver, and copper; blue, purple, and crimson yarns, fine linen, and goats’ hair; tanned ram skins, dolphin skins, and acacia wood; oil for lighting, spices for the anointing oil and for the aromatic incense; lapis lazuli and other stones for setting, for the ephod and the breastpiece.” (Exodus 35:5-9*)

What happened?  Well, we’re told the following:

“And everyone who excelled in ability and everyone whose spirit was moved came, bringing to God an offering for the work of the Tent of Meeting and for all its service and for the sacral vestments. Men and women, all whose hearts moved them, all who would make an elevation offering of gold to God, came bringing brooches, earrings, rings, and pendants—gold objects of all kinds. And everyone who possessed blue, purple, and crimson yarns, fine linen, goats’ hair, tanned ram skins, and dolphin skins, brought them; everyone who would make gifts of silver or copper brought them as gifts for God; and everyone who possessed acacia wood for any work of the service brought that. And all the skilled women spun with their own hands, and brought what they had spun, in blue, purple, and crimson yarns, and in fine linen. And all the women who excelled in that skill spun the goats’ hair. And the chieftains brought lapis lazuli and other stones for setting, for the ephod and for the breastpiece; and spices and oil for lighting, for the anointing oil, and for the aromatic incense. Thus the Israelites, all the men and women whose hearts moved them to bring anything for the work that God, through Moses, had commanded to be done, brought it as a freewill offering to God.” (Exodus 35:22-29*)

Wow! This surprising and unexpected outpouring of time, talent, and treasure is so immense that Moses declares, “Let no man or woman make further effort toward gifts for the sanctuary!” (Exodus 36:6) The Torah adds “their efforts had been more than enough for all the tasks to be done.” (Exodus 36:6-7*)

This incredible lesson brings up a powerful lesson and thought-provoking question, namely, how much effort do we put into our relationships with others and those organizations that we care about? Do we honestly spend enough helping out a friend in need, quality time with our beloved spouses, mentoring and teaching our children, volunteering in our congregations and communities, and developing our junior colleagues at work?  All too often we hear people say, “I wish my civic club had this,” or “I wish my congregation did that,” or “why isn’t my kid able to hit home runs, speak three languages, or perform calculus equations,” yet, do not take the time, space, or initiative to stand up, lead, and effect those changes. The Israelites in Vayakhel definitely show us what right looks like.

As Rabbi Ben He He of the Talmud famously and succinctly taught, “According to the labor is the reward.” (Pirkei Avot 5:23*)

Bizrat HaShem, with God’s help, may we get out of life, our endeavors, and our relationships what we put into them, and may our reward always reflect our labor.

Wishing you a Good Shabbos and a great weekend.

Bivrakha,

Rabbi Aaron Stucker-Rozovsky

Beth El Congregation | 520 Fairmont Ave, Winchester, VA 22601

(540) 667-1889 (office)

Shabbat Shalom and Chag Purim Sameach – Happy Purim! I hope this finds you all well.

Good leaders…well, you know them as soon as you see them. It’s the white collar CEO or manager who goes down to the factory floor, takes off his coat and tie, rolls up his sleeves, and jumps in on the assembly line because a lot of the workforce is out with the flu. It’s the exhausted and hungry Army Officer and Senior NCO who still doesn’t eat until they are sure that all their subordinates have eaten first. And it’s the high school principal who jumps in and subs a class when one of her teachers has to leave abruptly because of a family emergency. No matter how bad or miserable things get, good leaders represent for us a glimmer of light. They inspire us to achieve what we didn’t think possible and are living signs of determination, grit, hope, and resiliency.

Both in this week’s parsha of Ki Tissa (Exodus 30:11-34:34) as well as on this joyous holiday of Purim, we see leadership at its finest.

First, Ki Tissa. While Moses is busy receiving the Ten Commandments on Mount Sinai, the people lose faith, and then construct and begin worshipping the golden calf. After Moses smashes the tablets and restores order, he turns to God and cries out: “Alas, this people is guilty of a great sin in making for themselves a god of gold. Now, if You will forgive their sin [well and good]; but if not, erase me from the record which You have written!”(Exodus 32:32)*.

Wow! It is the ultimate “the buck stops with me.” In other words, Moses takes responsibility and accountability for all those under him. He could have easily disavowed, disowned, and discarded them without a second thought, yet he consciously and loyally sticks with them and again throws his lot in with theirs.

The great Rebbe Menachem Mendel Schneerson (z”l), the late Lubavitcher Rebbe, commented:

“The entire being of Moses was the Torah he brought to his people. The Torah was more than something he taught. It was what he was. It was his G-d within him.

Yet when it came to a choice between the Torah or his people, he chose his people. He said, ‘And if you do not forgive them, then wipe me out from Your book that You have written!’

His whole being was the Torah,

but deep into his essence, at the very core,

was his oneness with his people.”[1]

Next, there is Esther…Queen Esther. When her uncle Mordechai tells her that Haman is planning on murdering all of the Jews and that she must plead the case of their people to her husband the king, she tells him that visiting her all-powerful husband without an invitation may very likely result in her execution, and that she will go to him nonetheless.

Her words, her solemn declaration have echoed throughout the ages, from the ghettos of Poland and gas chambers of Auschwitz to the yeshivas of Jerusalem and kibbutzim of Israel, and everywhere in between: “…I shall go to the king, though it is contrary to the law; and if I am to perish, I shall perish!” (Esther 4:16)*

A totally selfless and heroic act.

At some point in life, either by voluntary zeal or by sheer force of fate and circumstance, we are all going to find ourselves in positions of leadership and authority. There will come a point where we will be in charge, it’s going to happen. The question remains, what sort of leader do you want to be?

Bizrat HaShem, with God’s help, may we all be leaders like Moshe Rabbeinu and we may all be leaders worthy of Esther HaMalka.

Wishing you a Good Shabbos and a very happy and joyous Happy Purim.

Bivrakha,

Rabbi Aaron Stucker-Rozovsky

Beth El Congregation | 520 Fairmont Ave, Winchester, VA 22601

(540) 667-1889 (office)

I hope this finds you well.

If there’s one thing most people can’t abide by, it’s one-sided relationships. People can’t stand by and watch a girlfriend who puts all the hard work, time, love, and effort into her relationship while her ungrateful boyfriend contributes nothing, all the while sitting back on his recliner in his man cave, drinking beer, eating nachos, and playing video games. Equally, people can’t stomach a boyfriend who gives and gives and gives while his girlfriend simply expects to be pampered and waited on hand and foot. The same can be said of a lazy employee, an indifferent employer, an obnoxious and rude customer, or a neglectful proprietor and disinterested merchant. Sadly, we have all experienced this at some point or another. We are not wrong for expecting a certain basic level of commitment, concern, support and basic gratitude from those with whom we share a mutually-agreed upon bond or contract of any sort. A healthy relationship simply has to be two-sided.

One of our people’s most beautiful prayers is that of Ahavat Olam (“Eternal Love”). It reads:

“With an eternal love have You loved your people Israel, by teaching us the Torah and its commandments, laws and precepts. Therefore, Adonai our God, we shall meditate on Your laws when we lie down and when we rise up, and we shall rejoice in the words of Your Torah and Your commandments for ever. For they are our life and the length of our days, and we shall reflect upon them day and night.”[1]

“Eternal”, “for ever,” “day and night”- It is clear that God’s love and concern for us is a constant fixture in our lives.

The question is, however, do we actually reciprocate that love?

Sadly, a recent survey showed that the majority of American Jews, 58%, rarely pray, if ever.[2] On top of this, one has to wonder that if/when the vast majority of our brethren do indeed pray, if it is out of genuine love, thanksgiving, and appreciation for all that God has given us, or if it is out of exasperation, desperation, emergency, and seeing no other earthly, tangible options.

In this week’s parsha of Tetzaveh we are commanded to light the menorah and burn incense in the tabernacle daily.[3]  Daily, daily, daily. The Tabernacle, as one will recall, was God’s dwelling place among the people of Israel. In other words, our ancestors had a loving obligation to attend to God with the same consistency and normalcy that He attended to them. They are simple gestures, but their uninterrupted frequency, solid coordination, and constancy speak volumes.

It’s often asked, does God show up for us? However, how often is the reciprocal question asked, do we show up for God?

Perhaps the lesson here is that we should remind ourselves daily of all that God has done and continues to do for us, and that a simple thank you both day and night demonstrates and reaffirms our love and appreciation for the Divine.

Bizrat HaShem, may we show up for God with the same love and devotion with which He shows up for us.

Wishing you a Good Shabbos and a wonderful, restful weekend.

Bivrakha,

Rabbi Aaron Stucker-Rozovsky

Beth El Congregation | 520 Fairmont Ave, Winchester, VA 22601

(540) 667-1889 (office)

I hope this finds you all well.

It would be hard to find anyone who would say that kindness isn’t a virtue, a good thing, something worth emulating and teaching to our children from their earliest days. But can kindness ever be seen as a weakness, a flaw, something to be afraid of…something bad?

The answer is surprisingly and sadly…yes.

But how? How can showing hospitality, charity, mercy, compassion, empathy, or selflessness ever be a bad thing, especially towards those who are the most vulnerable? Seriously, how?

In this week’s parsha of Mishpatim (Exodus 21:1–24:18) we learn why sometimes we must temper or restrain our kindness. We are given the following mitzvah (commandment) when it comes to adjudicating civil suits: “nor shall you show deference to a poor person in a dispute.” [Exodus 23:3 (courtesy Sefaria.org)]

In other words, we are to weigh a poor person with the same standing as a wealthy person, neither more nor less. The case is not to be decided on someone’s wealth, status in the community, their last name, or who their mom or dad is. The determining factor is the law and facts, nothing more or less.

Ok, but what are some examples, how can this possibly play out?

Well, let’s say a wealthy ranch owner hires a poor cow polk to watch his cattle and horses. The ranch hand is negligent and doesn’t feed or water the cows and horses, and sadly, they die. Would it be right for the court to say to the ranch owner, “well, you’re rich, so you can take the hit, and this poor, lowly guy you hired doesn’t have two nickels to rub together, so we’re going to cut him a break. Sorry, not sorry pal”?

Or let’s say a person of great means hires someone who doesn’t have as much to clean their house and this second person steals from the wealthy owner of the house. Would it be right for the court to let that thief off the hook? No, of course not!

The great sages of our people impress upon us why this commandment is so important, so vital, so essential. Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz taught, “This law, which is addressed to a judge, refers to the tendency to have mercy for the weaker litigant. A judge must issue a just verdict, even if a pitiful individual will thereby suffer.”[1]  Likewise, the Rashbam commented, “‘do not favor the poor nor show deference to the rich’. The unvarying motto is ‘judge your kinsman fairly.’”[2]

The greatest respect we can give to society, the law, and indeed all people regardless of their station is to treat them fairly and equally before the law without favoritism or prejudice one way or the other.

The lesson of this commandment is not to hide our kind hearts, but to know when to restrain them and temper with justice, law, righteousness, and fairness.

Bizrat HaShem, with God’s help, may we always know when to act kindly and when to act justly.

Wishing you all a Good Shabbos and a great weekend.

Bivrakha,

Rabbi Aaron Stucker-Rozovsky

Beth El Congregation | 520 Fairmont Ave, Winchester, VA 22601

(540) 667-1889 (office)